via the spruce: Raise a responsible child who’s happy to help out, not reluctant to pitch in. With some patience and a few parenting tricks up your sleeve, you’ll be well on your way to raising a responsible child who becomes a responsible adult.

Assign Age-Appropriate Tasks
Everyone in your house can be given specific tasks to teach them responsibility. Even your toddlers can help out and starting them young makes it easier to hand them even more responsibility as they grow older.

Assign age-appropriate tasks around the house. Preschoolers can dust with socks over their hands. Older kids can help empty the dishwasher, vacuum or set the table for dinner.

Lay Out Each Family Member’s Responsibilities
You can give your newborn a pass on taking responsibility right now. But your two year old can still get involved and be one of your tiny helpers.

Lay out each family member’s responsibilities ahead of time to get everyone on the same page. Even Mom and Dad can be listed on chore charts and weekly calendars so the whole family knows everything that each other does to make your household run smoothly.

Praise Them for Taking Responsibility
A job well done deserves praise. We often forget to add in the praise for each task kids complete because we don’t get that same praise every time we wipe down a kitchen counter or empty out the dryer’s lint trap. But as our children are learning what responsibility is, we need to be sure we’re there to praise them for a job well done when they pick their clothes up off the floor and dust their furniture.We often forget to add in the praise for each task kids complete because we don’t get that same praise every time we wipe down a kitchen counter or empty out the dryer’s lint trap.

But as our children are learning what responsibility is, we need to be sure we’re there to praise them for a job well done when they pick their clothes up off the floor and dust their furniture.

Avoid Constant Rewards
Do you get free ice cream every time you mop? Keep this in mind as you try to raise a responsible child.

Instead of promising your child a candy bar if she takes out the trash, let her feel the reward of taking responsibility without having to be bribed. You can surprise your kids with rewards or reward them one day a week but don’t carry around a pocket full of candy so you can dole a piece out every time one of your kids does something they’ve been told to do.

Use Reward Tools Wisely
There are so many tools you can use to outline responsibilities, mark those achievements and work toward a goal or reward without having to take the route above of bribing and giving your child something every single time she does something that you’ve defined as her role in your household.

Look for household responsibility charts. Many have space for all of the kids in your house in one spot so you don’t have to buy separate charts for each child. One favorite is the Magnetic Reward Responsibility / Behavior Chart that accommodates up to three children. This great chart comes with pre-printed responsibilities you use, such as “brush my teeth” and “finish my homework.” But it also comes with blanks you can write on with the included dry erase pen so you can customize the responsibilities. Each child gets a color star to place in the box when they’ve completed that responsibility and at the bottom they get to define the goal they’re working toward once they complete all responsibilities, like “go out for an ice cream” or “get a new book” when they reach a certain level of stars.

Let Your Children Feel the Consequences of Not Taking Responsibility
What would happen if you stopped cleaning the house, taking the kids everywhere they needed to be or didn’t brush your teeth anymore? Of course you’re going to fulfill your responsibilities and you can make sure your kids do too.

We tend to ride our kids to get this and that done — those chores and other responsibilities that we’ve laid out so many times, yet they seem to keep forgetting. Of course, you don’t want your child to fail science by not reminding her to study for her test but there are other responsibilities you can simply let her ignore and feel the consequences of not taking the responsibility to do them. Before you get started on laying out your child’s responsibilities, let her know what those consequences will be.

You can do this as one continuing consequence, like not completing those five responsibilities each week results in a loss of TV or you can set those consequences week by week based on the activities you have going on at the time.

Take a Step Back
We know what would happen if we shirked our responsibilities and we don’t want our kids to neglect their responsibilities either. It can be incredibly frustrating when your child seems to not hear you or to flat out ignore you, though.

But it’s important to take a step back. Don’t lose your cool and bark about how important their responsibilities are. You want them to enjoy being responsible, not resentful of it.

Be Patient
It will take time for your children to master their responsibilities. They’re still kids and it will take time for them to remember their responsibilities and fully understand their importance.

Your guidance is crucial when you want to raise a responsible child who becomes a responsible adult. But it needs to be done in a nurturing way that encourages them to participate and actually gets them excited about contributing. Otherwise, your child starts to see responsibilities as something they’re getting in trouble for instead of something that’s actually rewarding. Pick your battles and remember raising a responsible child is a long-term goal that won’t be completed overnight.


via Penny Pinchin: Learn how to make a chore chart for kids, no matter their age. There are chores for kids of all ages — even as young as age 3! A simple chore chart can help your child remember what he or she must do every day.

Do you struggle to get your kids to do their chores — or even to figure out WHAT chores they need to do? You are not alone. And then, when you do figure out the chores, getting your kids to do them — with a smile on their face — is another obstacle all together.

As Moms and Dads, part of what we need to teach our children is how to contribute to the running of our household, which in turn can help them to become contributing members of society. One way we do this by assigning chores for kids via a chore chart. They help the house run smoother and they actually get the opportunity to take ownership of a task.

That alone can boost self-esteem and help them with their development. I know my kids get a lot of satisfaction when they complete a task.

Other ideas for chore charts for kids:

  • The Ticket Reward & Fine Method
  • When Should I Start My Child on an Allowance?
  • Paying Your Kids For Chores with a Kid Safe Debit Card (You Completely Control)
  • How Toy Jail Teaches Responsibility

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TIPS FOR USING A CHORE CHART FOR KIDS

There are several things that you need to keep in mind when it creating and using a chore chart with your kids. The following tips will help you achieve chore chart success with your own children.

1. KEEP IT AGE APPROPRIATE

With three kids of varying ages, the chores we require differ for each of them. Our oldest has more chores such as doing laundry whereas we keep it simple for our youngest. Each of their chore charts identify what they need to do each week.

You will want to print this simple age appropriate chores list and keep it handy. It is a guide to help parents determine which chores children can do at every age. This way, you can find new chores to add to your child’s chore list.

This is a great way to help your children learn how to complete these tasks. However, remember that you can’t expect perfection. Just expect for them to try their best. This chart is a great way for them to learn how to take care of themselves and their own home.

You may also try a task listed and find that your child is not yet ready to try that. Just change what you do the following week. Conversely, you may feel your child can take care of items listed in an age group which is older. That too is fine. This is a guide to help you find those items which work for both you and your child.

2. LET THE KIDS HELP

You know the chores your kids can handle, so have them help creating their own chore chart. Look over the chore list and have them decide which ones they will do this week.

You will not want to allow them to select everything (they will pick the simplest ones). But, when he or she feels a part of the decision making process, there is more motivation to do every chore.

3. MAKE THE CHORE CHART VISIBLE

It is important that your child can see the chore chart and keep track of what he or she has done for the week. This can be done on a white board on your refrigerator or even a piece of paper tacked to a bulletin board.

Remind your child to update their chore list every day. I find that when my kids can physically check a box or a line to show they did something, they do much better at keeping track of what they have done and those items they have yet to complete.

Below you will find two different printable chore charts. One is very basic and is great for younger children, while the other is more detailed and perfect for older children.

Whether you use one of the charts below or a completely different chore chart, make sure it is visible and easy for your child to see and follow.

If your children are a bit older, you can use the Responsibility Chart instead. This chart has spaces for the regular chores (Commissions), additional tasks (Bonuses) and areas where they tend to get into trouble (fines). You tally up the income and take away the fines each week and they earn the difference. This chart is created to teach them, well, responsibility in the workplace.

They learn that if they do not complete the work, they do not get paid. They also learn that if they do the wrong thing (like fight or disrespect Mom and Dad), they have a fine. We compare this to speeding or being reckless and causing damage to things. It works well for our kids and they sure hate it when we say the word “FINE”!

If you want even more detailed information into how we use the Responsibility Chart in our home, you can read about that here — Teaching Our Children Financial Responsibility.

4. DETERMINE THE REWARD OR INCENTIVE

Rewards will vary greatly from family to family. For some parents, the chores are required just as part of being a part of the family. They are expected to contribute and there is no reward attached to it. For others, it is simply financial. They pay per chore or per week as the chore charts are completed.

The rewards may be incentive based such as sleepovers, extra time on the game system, etc. The beauty of any good system is that you can make it work for your family. You know your kids and your family structure, so you know what you expect and will give in return. A chore chart can serve as incentive and reminder for your kids (and quite possibly, even for you)!

5. DETERMINE THE PUNISHMENTS

If your child doesn’t do all of their chores, there must be a consequence. Of course, there will times when there circumstance outside of our control, which contribute to chores not being completed.

However, many times, the chores are not completed because your child simply forgot or decided not to do it. When this happens, you need to take away those rewards, such as a play date or the special treat he or she was to get the following day.

When your child forgets, help them get their chores done, but don’t give them a free pass. They still have to learn there are consequences in life when we don’t do what we are suppose to do.

6. LEAD BY EXAMPLE

Children are sponges and they watch everything you do. If you slack off and don’t do your daily chores, your children see this. Make sure you are responsible and doing what you need to every day. Your kids will be more motivated to do their daily chores when they see mom and dad doing the same.

7. MAKE SURE YOU STILL HAVE FUN

All work and no fun, makes Jack a dull boy. You’ve heard that, right? There is so much truth here! Add fun to the chores such as making it a game to toss laundry into the laundry basket.

In addition, allow time for the kids to have fun. After all, they are kids. Aim to strike a balance between the things they need to do and what let’s them enjoy being a kid.

8. DON’T OVERBURDEN YOUR KIDS

It’s important that children have chores to do. But, you don’t want them to be overwhelmed. When this happens, it may be time to change the chores or remove some of them completely.

During the school year, there may be sports and homework every night. During this time, you may need to scale back on the number or types of chores he or she needs to do.

9. WATCH OVER THEM

Kids need reminders and supervision when doing their work. Even my older kids need me to remind them about what they need to do. Gently guide them to get their daily chores completed every day before bed time.

10. TEACH THEM

You can’t expect your children to know what to do right away. It will take time to teach them the right way to dust and to do the laundry. Keep your expectations low at first and raise them as your child learns how to do every chore on his or her chore chart.

When learning how to make a chore chart for your kids, keep these tips in mind. Chore charts should teach and not cause burden or stress to anyone in the family.


Notes from MOMmy:

I am a believer that kids need to learn to do chores. I believe this is the best way to teach them to be self-sufficient. My kids have a list of chores to do at home.

Via Sunshine & Hurricanes: The Importance of Chores for Children (Printable Chore Chart)

Why are Chores for Children important?

We’ve all read the stories about today’s twenty-somethings.

The boomerang generation. The go-nowhere generation. Generation “y” bother.

These are just a few of the labels that follow them around. There are any number of theories and about a million articles that attempt to explain the challenges faced by these young adults.

There are probably elements of truth in all of them and yet at the same time not everything is likely deserved. Overall though, many people will agree that the phenomena of helicopter parenting definitely contributed. In an attempt to be both their best friends and their most ardent protectors, parents often shielded them from many of the realities and reasonable responsibilities that help a child mature into a productive and self reliant adult.

Image Source: flickr/ oldenoughforchores

Chores for Children And the Decline of Parental Expectations

One of the significant ways in which the household dynamic changed in recent decades was a steep decline in the expectation that children would contribute to the household in age appropriate ways. Some parents felt that the time spent on such menial tasks was not as worthwhile as working on homework. In other situations, children were so over-scheduled with activities crammed into every waking moment that there just wasn’t room for chores.

What these parents often overlooked unfortunately was that chores can be just as important to the future success of any child. Chores can be “easy wins” for kids, they usually don’t take much time, but they can steadily build a strong work ethic, confidence and even a sense of pride for being able to give back to their family. They are also essential to developing the basic life skills that will be needed to survive outside mom and dad’s house.

Chores for Children – What Are Your Kid Capable of?

Below you will find a printable chore chart you can hang on your fridge or even each child’s door that lists the types of chores for children that are appropriate at different ages. I realize for some people, the suggestions may be shocking.

That is part of the problem. By forgoing chores, we’ve arrived at a point where we often underestimate what our children are capable of and when. They are not helpless, they are helpers. Take advantage of this untapped support staff in your own home and free up some much deserved time for yourself!

We would love to know, what chores did you have to do as a child?
What chores for children do you think are important?